Have you ever been on a date and caught yourself checking Facebook or Twitter? How about feeling disappointed when you log on and see pictures of friends having fun without you? Maybe you’ve even caught yourself “cyber-stalking” someone you don’t even like? (guilty!)
If this sounds familiar, don’t worry because you aren’t alone (which is good news, since you hate being left out!); experts call this new psychological phenomenon Fear of Missing Out, or FOMO.
With the mega influence of social media and internet access available everywhere, it’s hard to notice the difference between superficial, online connections, and real, personal connections. Not only can social media allow us to second-guess our own lives, they also strip us away from them. As Hephzibah Anderson puts it in his article on FOMO, “We’re too busy tweeting about the scent of those roses actually to breathe it in.”
It’s never too late for a change – 3 steps to avoid FOMO: 
1. Be Proactive: Don’t wait for an invite or a notification - be proactive and create your own events. If you feel you missed out because you weren’t invited to last week’s game night? Host this week’s game night. Not only will you feel less left out, but you will also be surprised how many incoming invites will be received from sending one out.
**Living in the DC Metro area and need ideas about what to do? Visit Sonya Lowery’s World Next Door TV for incredible adventures in your own backyard.
**Not in D.C.? Not to worry! Sites like Meetup, and Livingsocial, are great to find or create offline events in any area.
2. Social Media is Shallow:When you’re feeling left out because your life doesn’t feel as exciting as what you see on Facebook, remember social media sites rarely show the whole picture of a person’s life. People tend to portray a persona online, promoting themselves and allowing others to see them in a way they want to be seen; dirty laundry is rarely aired.
Take for example superstars portrayed with a flawless perfect life. Not until Jay-Z’s song “Glory” (a tribute to the birth his and Beyonce’s new daughter, Blue Ivy) aired with the lyrics; “Last time the miscarriage was so tragic, We was afraid you disappeared but nah baby, you magic,” did fans know about the couple’s tragic miscarriage. No one knew the truth behind the glossy magazine covers. No life is perfect – no matter their FB status!
3. Create Social Boundaries
1. Set a certain time of the night when your laptop will be closed and phone turned off.
2. Limit yourself to only one “status update” a day.
3. Leave work at the office, or during “work hours.”
Minimizing distractions allow you to have a better time doing what we’re already doing; watch that sunset, enjoy the concert, talk with your children. Cat Greenleaf of Talk Stoop promotes this in her L.U.S.T. campaign to Look Up and Stop Texting. “LUST isn’t saying we should NEVER text – just that adding a measure of control can add so much to our experience of being alive.”
Sooner than later, we may find ourselves at a crossroads between making the Internet our lives vs. a small reflection of them; avoid FOMO by living a life you love off-line, too!
Special thanks to contributing writer Melanie Kozak for this great piece.
Hello readers! My name is Melanie Kozak. I am currently a spring intern at HerExchange, and a women’s studies and journalism 
double major at The University of Maryland. I am from Jefferson, a lovely small town in Maryland that finds itself on the Potomac River nestled on the boarders of West Virginia and Virginia. I am a self-proclaimed feminist and am passionate about global human rights issues, and of course my Border collie, Sam. I’d love to receive feedback from my readers, Melanie@HerExchange.com.
